Coming to Terms with Below Average Attractiveness

A few years back (and every now and then) I tried to make a bit of a go as an amateur video performer. I set up my clip store, shot a few solo videos (and a few with a co-star) and tried to sell them.

I admit to being bad at the promotional aspect of things, so that obviously limited my earning potential. Not being able to show my face for personal and vanilla job reasons also limits me somewhat. I get that. I understand that.

But I admit to a larger concern, and it is one of the things that has vexed me and kept me from trying to set up more possible trade shoots.

The larger concern is that I feel that I am simply not good looking enough to work with others.

Preferences Are Fine. Fetishizing People Is Not.

I’ve seen it mentioned recently in a couple of tweets that “People are not a fetish”. I agree with the sentiment behind that statement, although I would refine it to read that “People should not be a fetish.” Because the reality is that people’s racial and ethnic backgrounds are, unfortunately, fetishes for some.

Since I’m a big nerd, though, let’s go to the dictionary (Thanks Merriam-Webster!):

fetish

noun  fe·tish 

1a : an object (such as a small stone carving of an animal) believed to have magical power to protect or aid its owner; broadly : a material object regarded with superstitious or extravagant trust or reverence

b : an object of irrational reverence or obsessive devotion : prepossession

c : an object or bodily part whose real or fantasied presence is psychologically necessary for sexual gratification and that is an object of fixation to the extent that it may interfere with complete sexual expression

2: fixation 

3: a rite or cult of fetish worshippers

Speaking as a black male, there are multiple subcultures where black men (and our skin color) are the focus of somewhat irrational reverence or prepossession; where our bodily parts are viewed as an object of fixation and the presence of certain parts are necessary for the sexual gratification of some individuals/couples.

Is that correct or nice? No. No one should be reduced to being viewed as a collection of discrete parts. And yet it happens a lot; too often in fact.

(Porn is guilty of doing this. All the damn time. In all kinds of different fucking ways, by the way).

Let’s move on to another word, though, that might make more sense in the context of some of the things we see bandied about online:

First FOSTA/SESTA. Now This Bullshit

So FOSTA/SESTA passed and completely disrupted several aspects of the adult entertainment industry online, causing several major escort review sites and message boards to shut down, along with the entire personals section of Craigslist as well as the total sites Backpage and Mojovillage. I wrote about that here.

Now, it appears that the next prong in the attack on American sex workers is to stop them for having access to money. A current bill that has passed the House but has not yet come up for vote in the Senate is the End Banking for Human Traffickers Act. Again, meant to crack down on human trafficking, but will instead take aim at the people that have voluntarily entered into sex work.

Don't Let FOSTA/SESTA Be The End Of Sex Work

It has been horrifying to witness the fallout from the signing of FOSTA/SESTA and what it has done to sexwork in the United States.

For those who have been living under a rock, FOSTA (Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act) and SESTA (Stop Enabling Sex Traffickers Act) are bills from the House and Senate that were signed into law back in April. Ostensibly, on the face, the bill were created to make it illegal to knowingly assist, facilitate, or support sex trafficking.

However, they was essentially a poison pill included that amended a past Communication Decency Act, which removed immunity from online services for the actions of their users.

What this poison pill has led to was the seizure of Backpage.com, the termination of the classified section of Craigslist, and the shutdown (out of fear) of other sites in the United States that provided a forum for professional sex workers to advertise and promote their services.

It has also led to Twitter and other social media sites to revise their terms of use to provide them more shielding in the wake of FOSTA/SESTA (and probably to continue and step up their shadowbanning of sex workers).

This has had harmful, deleterious affects on the women who utilize these services.

Guys, We Are Killing Porn

I admit that I do not subscribe to traditional machismo, and that probably, in the eyes of some of y'all, invalidates the point I am about to make. But to be blunt, I don't really give a fuck if you think that. It doesn't make it any less true.

Here goes:

Us guys are killing porn.

We are killing porn in a wide variety of ways.

Hold on. Wait a damn minute? What do you mean we're killing porn? Aren't you being a bit ridiculous in making that claim?

I don't really think I am.

I've been watching and consuming porn for almost 25 years. I think that the blessing and boon that is the internet was the beginning of the downhill slide, but the descent has only accelerated in the last decade or so.

The tube sites and piracy negatively impact the bottom line of many of the companies. On some level, it has stifled creativity, IMHO. It also financially hurts the pro-am performer, as they receive no compensation for stolen clips/videos that you wank to for free (and guilt free, apparently).

Fat Guys Needed For Filming!

If you've followed me on Twitter or even gone back through some of the writing I've done on here, I've long been an advocate of us fat guys showing out on video more in positive ways. I think it's necessary for us to show that we can be loved and are lovable too, damnit.

Tim Von Swine, one of the best directors of all time and a fellow fat guy, thinks so as well. His "Pigpen" video series (and subsequent site) shows porn actress of all sizes (petite pixies to BBW) getting it on with him. Us "Big Handsome Men" (BHMs) can sling dick just as good as the studs with six packs, and I give all the credit to Swiney for being a trailblazer in that regard.

Return of the Mack. Okay, so not really.

First...a little mood music:

 

 

Okay, now that that is out of the way, I want to say welcome (once again).

 

Welcome to version 2.0 of BBW Pornucopia.

 

The site has essentially, save for one short story, has laid dormant for a year. Honestly, the last real bursts of activity were in 2013. As often happens, life got in the way. And since this site is more of a labor of love than a source of income, income generating activities had to take priority.

 

With that being said, though, I firmly believe that I need to carve out some time each month to focus on hobbies. And so, I come back to this site.

So, what is it going to look like going forward? I'll discuss below.

Fine line between Flirting and Thirsting?

Social media has been a wonderful tool in the 21^st century. I’ve written before about the positives of the way that it allows fans of folks who work in the adult industry. It has been a boon.

One of the places I find myself struggling at times, though, is when it comes to compliments and innuendo. Again, a topic that I have espoused theories about in the past, so it’s slightly trodden ground.

But the place I am coming from today is the external perception that you can face from others if you go too far.

In other words, there is a fine line between flirty and thirsty.

I Found "The Minion" site. I am now depressed



In my continuing series of thinking about fat guys in porn, I came across a site that gave me pause the other day.

The pic above comes from a site called, "The Minion."

Among the tag lines for the site is, "You're nobody till [sic] you've been fucked by him." "A hard banging pimp! He loves food as much as pussy."

Here's the main trailer for the site. Watch it and see for yourself:





I don't know how else to say it, but this site confirms a lot of my fears about how us big guys are portrayed in adult films.

We are comic relief. We're slobby, slovenly schlubs mainly interested in food. We are objects to be derided or physically assaulted because, hey, it's funny. Oh, and let's be misogynistic towards our co-stars because again, it's funny! Ha ha ha ha ha! Aren't you laughing?

I'm not.

We obviously cannot be desired because we're fat. We can't be viewed as sexy. Yeah, we might have a beautiful woman suck our cock, but it's only after a lot of other shit happens like food fights, smacking with sticks or getting shot with a garden hose.

I guess it's good to have a niche, and hey, he's shooting (or shot) these scenes. But why can't it be played straight instead of as a farce?

"It's Just Porn" Doesn't Cut It Anymore For Me

It's a refrain I've seen thrown out there as a pithy excuse, in my opinion, for allowing the actions of others to stand.

"It's Just Porn."

Three simple words that are to stand as an encapsulation of an anything goes attitude, and if you don't just acquiesce or roll with the punches, then you must just be some stodgy civilian or an insider with a burr up their ass.

It's a phrase that speaks of a high level of arrogance for those who might be voicing a complaint, or merely speaking out loud about something that bothers them and, hey, maybe it wouldn't hurt to re-examine it a little bit.

I know, I know. I am providing ammunition for those who utter this vile little phrase. In some respects, I guess I am playing right into their hands with my declaration of war on this lazy turn of phrase.

And as a civilian, I know that my words are not going to be held in any esteem.

But I just have to throw out there that just because you are in porn, it shouldn't be viewed as carte blanche to do or say stupid, offensive, ignorant things (even in the context of work) and be given a free pass for it.

Featured Scene: Katie St. Ives and Tim Von Swine and more on BHMs in Porn.



 

 

As a big handsome man (BHM-although my own feeling about my handsomeness makes me reticient to use such a moniker for myself), I've lamented the standing of larger men in the world of porn.

So obviously, when I found out about Tim Von Swine's Whale Cam (or Swiney' Pigpen) project, I was, of course, thrilled to check it out and pump it up.

In the scene I am honoring as a featured scene today, it's Tim and his buddy Mr. Maple (that lucky bastard) tag teaming the very cute Katie St. Ives..

Anyway, I can't embed the trailer, but the trailer is available at the same place you can buy the scene. It's an exclusive for chubold.com. Go there and search "Pigpen".

Oh, I know, I know; there are people out there who would gag at such a scene. It features two fat people, and that would make some folks tiny little heads explode. And not in the sense that you may think I mean, given that this is a porn blog.

Offering A Compliment Does Not Equal Wanting To Get In Your Pants



It's a hard knock life on social media sometimes for male fans. Granted, we often to it to ourselves, and I realize that the actions of a jackwadish, ignorant few leads to frustrations that the rest of us have to live with.

To the lovely ladies that I follow, please hear me out. I am not trying to offer false flattery. I am not trying to get into your pants, nor do I think that the silly words I throw out there will be enough for you to come out to Las Vegas (if you don't already live here), drop your drawers and fling yourself onto my bed in the throes of passionate, wanton lust.

Child, please. To paraphrase Chris Rock from his "Never Scared" concert and DVD, I am not that kind of guy. I never really meet and girls that want to fuck me. I just don't bring it out of them like that. When women see me that they want to fuck me, they get pragmatic about it. That is just my lot in life, and I deal with it.

I wanted to be clear, though; if I offer a comment complimenting you on a picture, or your hair, or your eyes, it's not to get in your pants. From me, it is a sincere compliment. I try not to make it fawning, or too lurid if it has to do with your naughty bits. If I'm offering a compliment, it is a compliment and nothing more.

I don't have an ulterior motive. I'm just trying to say something nice that may brighten your day.

Because even though I am awful at receiving compliments, who doesn't like to be told something positive about themselves? Be it a physical attribute or something related to personality, it's just a random act of kindness to me.

/drops mic.

Save The Drama For Yo' Mama. Or At Least Take It Offline



Look, let's just cut right to the chase.

Lately, on the Twitter-webz, there has been, shall we say, a bit of drama circulating within the BBW porn performer circle.

Actually, the drama seems to be radiating from one source in particular. Now, to be fair, I don't quite know what this one woman's issue is, as she apparently is tweeting things and then pulling them down after they get a response.

Funnily enough, this same individual screenshots phone messages and tweets directed at her (allegedly) so that she can have evidence in case she is wronged (I guess) and can let the whole world know exactly what YOU did to wrong her.

Or something along those lines.

Look, I'm not trying to be a white knight, as I happen to know and am friendly with a few of the individuals who received some of this individual's wrath over the last few days. Am I best friends? No. Have I slept with any of the people involved? Hell, no. Have I performed with any of the people involved? (Laughing hysterically.)

(Wiping tears from eyes.)

No. No, I haven't.

So, let me reiterate: I am not being a white knight. I am not taking sides in this debate. I do think that the individual who seems to have issues with everyone might want to take a good, long look in the mirror. Because the ugliness that you are radiating isn't because other people are the problem. I think that you, madam, are the actual epicenter of the negativity and irrational behavior.

Beef with one person is expected; it is naive and difficult to think that everyone within a given industry/given community is going to like each other. It doesn't happen because there are enough individual differences among a sufficiently large enough group of people to cause friction between any two individuals.

With that being said, though:

* When there is a line out the door of people who feel the need to call you names in retaliation for some things that you've said

* When you feel that you have to document the actions of everyone around you to the point where you are screenshotting conversations and not deleting messages for "business purposes" yet you delete things that YOU'VE written

I think the problem lies with you. Most of the weight is on the other side of the balance scale, and the scale is not tipping in your favor.

Again, that is just my outside opinion. I do understand that I do not have all of the facts, so that may be contributing to my confusion. Of course, in most cases, we know that there are three sides to any story, with the truth being somewhere in between the recollections of the two primary parties involved.

I do, however, want to make a larger point to all of the models/camgirls/performers out there, and this is to point something out as a fan.

It's...disheartening, to say the very least, to see so much shit fly back and forth.

Again, I am not so naive to think that these back and forths break down any mythologized ideal/fantasy about you.

But it comes across as immature at best, to be frank, to have so much dirty laundry out there. I really do wish that a lot of this shit went backchannel; utilize some other method of communicating your issues with each other.

I just don't think that a complete airing of all of the shit that goes on needs to happen on social networks/social media. It makes all involved look small, petty and immature. It's like revisiting junior high school or lower with the level of name calling that takes place.

Twitter is something of an instant release. You type it out in 140 characters or so (maybe longer if you use Twitlonger or just break it up into multiple tweets) and you get to vent. It's akin to punching a locker or a wall. Sometimes, you just want to hit something.

I get it, I do.

But does hitting that wall actually accomplish anything? Isn't there a greater risk involved of you injuring yourself than there is of injuring the sheetrock or the piece of metal?

Maybe I'm in the minority here; maybe it's how I was raised or trained in conflict mediation when I worked in my previous field. But I've always been told/believed that it was better to either air out differences directly, without using intermediaries unless absolutely forced to.

I also believe that, well, trolls enjoy being fed. And internet trolls feed off of attention—whether that is positive attention or negative attention. All that matters to the internet troll is the attention comes towards them.

Which is another reason, I say, to keep these kinds of arguments off of social media, especially if you are in the right. It's most likely going to get swallowed up by the noise.

I live by this saying from Macbeth, Act 5, Scene 5:

MACBETH
...And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

"-Isms" Are Alive And Well In Porn. But It's Not Okay

When it comes to porn, the primary -ism that most people want to focus on is jism.

Crass, I know, and it's not the best lede I could've come up with. But then again, the things I'm about to talk about are also kind of crude, and so it doesn't hurt to go ahead and lower the level of discourse right from the start.

It was brought to my attention via my friend Kelly Shibari that there is a XXX parody that features a Caucasian actor portraying an Asian-American character from the sci-fi zombie show The Walking Dead.

So what, you may say. People have played against heritage before. What's the big deal?

Well, the big deal is that the actor was painted in what can best be described as, "Yellowface." Tape was apparently also applied to his eyes to alter their shape to better fit the character.   (Edited: This was incorrect information. Redacted.)

Oh, no. Just...no.

High Quality Hetero Porn with Fat Guys? Eureka!



With a name like BBW Pornucopia, I obviously focus on plus sized women in pornography, running the gamut from "Plumpers" to "Supersized BBWs." (By the way, I hate the labels game, but since it is what is used, we'll roll with it.)

However, I have mentioned from time to time that I find the lack of Big Handsome Men (aka Fat Dudes) in porn to be a little disturbing/depressing. At least, there is a lack of fat dudes in straight porn; obviously within gay porn there is the whole subgenre of chubs and bears, but that is a whole other point of discussion, and even so, there are not that many companies producing that kind of porn either.

Suffice to say, fat guys in porn is not a normal occurence. I've referred to it before, and even joked about starting my own company, but I don't want to totally beat a dead horse.

So when I was doing some surfing a few weeks ago, imagine my surprise when I came across something that Tim Von Swine (of Mike John Productions) has been working on for, apparently, a number of years. I believe that Tim has been using a couple of different names for it, alternately using "Whale Cam" or, as I came across it, "Swiney's Pigpen".

I'll let Von Swine explain it in his own words. This is from his blog posting in August 2012. (Hey, as I said before: I just came across this a few weeks ago.):

Does anyone have about $20,000 that they don't need? If so, I'll take it.

Yeah. Twenty grand.

If I was looking to get into the self-produced, high quality BBW porn industry, this is what I figured I would need as far as gear was concerned. All prices (except for the computers) are based on the price on Amazon.com as of today, Halloween 2012:

Three Sony HDR-FX7 cameras. High definition video. Integrated microphone. Three for multiple angles/camera people (if I decide to go that route). Price tag: $1,998 each ($5,994)

Three backup batteries for the videocameras. Never hurts to be prepared. $119.99 each ($359.97)

Nikon D5100 Camera. A digital SLR camera to take high resolution, high quality photos. $596.95

Nikon 44-300mm lens. $399.00

Nikon SB 400AF speedlight flash. $116.95

EasyFoto flash diffuser. $6.00

Amazon Basics remote for D5100. For those times when you have to be hands free because you're being hands on. $9.99

Nikon Battery ($39.95) and Nikon Charger ($44.95). Have to have backup just in case.

Gear Bag for Nikon camera and accessories. $19.99

Three Polaroid tripods for multiple angles (not just POV): $39.99 each ($119.97)

Photography kit with lighting umbrellas and background lights. If you've been in a hotel, you know the lighting sucks in those places. $84.00

SanDisk 16GB memory card for the digital camera. $17.49 each ($34.98)

Seagate 3TB external drive. Storage for the pictures/video. They have to live somewhere. $138.69.

With free shipping from Amazon.com, that brings the bill to $7964.79.

But if I have the tools to shoot this video, I need a computer to handle the editing duties. What better way than with a Mac. (And this is coming from a Windows guy).

So a Mac Pro Server from Apple runs $2,999.

Oh, and a screen is necessary, like the 27" cinema screen for $999.

Which brings the grand total up to $11,962.79.

So why am I asking for $20,000?

Well, the balance will be for human resources (i.e. actresses or other camera people) and for legal fees in getting paperwork filed and tests taken. At least for the first few shoots.

Alright. I'll hedge my bets and raise the seed money need up to $25,000.

Now that I look at it...this isn't that easy. Or cheap.

Unless I hit the jackpot, it looks like a pipe dream. I'm better off being a fan, huh?

Burning Question: Porn Star LTR?

We have a burning question provided by the lovely Betty Blac that I told her I would answer in a blog post instead of a tweet. The question:

Would you marry or have a ltr with a porn star? Why or why not? Open or closed relationship?
— Betty Blac (@BettyBlac1) October 1, 2012

Well. Here we go.

Kissing Ass Alone Won't Cut It

I am far from an expert on most things. I am still learning about the adult industry, for one thing. I am learning more about the BBW genre on a daily basis as well, and some of the subgenres present within the field.

I am also far from an expert when it comes to women, although there are times when I feel less foreign in that arena than in others that actually fall within my purview.

With all of that being said...guys, it might be time to review a few rules of engagement centering around interacting with your favorite adult industry worker. It could be a contract girl, a BBW Plumper Pass actress, a SSBBW Cam Girl, an escort...whoever or whatever floats your own particular pontoon.

From the, "LOL...WHUT? Are you shitting me? Files"

Reading a piece on MSN.com today about how some magazine are retouching the pictures of models. Not that this is news in and of itself, as there has been plenty written about how models are airbrushed and (controversially) made to look thinner.

But this piece, which is actually from Blisstree.com, is about the more sinister trend of taking thin models, and making them look, well, fuller.

It's called "reverse retouching" where a skinny model has weight added to the thighs, midsection and arms.

Which begs this question, as far as I am concerned: Why not used models that are fuller in the first place?

Don't tell me that there is a lack of beautiful women that are not size 00. They exist; I see them every day out here where I live in the Las Vegas area. There are beautiful women of all shapes and sizes.

I don't see the need to expend the extra effort to now perpetuate a myth at all.

If you want a thin model, use a thin model. Don't take someone and make them skinny.

If you want a fuller model, then for goodness sake, go out and find them.

The artificiality of these major fashion magazine and ads makes me want to vomit.

See? Twitter does have a role?

Back in the fall, when I initially had the post wondering about the general lack of fat guys in porn on my old blog, I received a direct message on my Twitter account from someone I am following. She had read my post, and she had a question for me that got me thinking.

She asked, "Hetro guys watch to see the women right? Don't you think a LARGE man would block the view?"

I responded with, "Not necessarily. Missionary with a high camera angle. Doggie with a slightly below bed level angle. Any side camera angle will do as well."

Which I do think is the case.

Look, it's not like fat guys have never been filmed before; as I mention in the original post from a couple of months ago, just look at the gay porn world, where there are film companies devoted to bears and chubs.

She then suggested that I should start my own film company.

In a fantasy world, I probably would. Alas, I lack two things:

1. The capital funds to invest in making sure that I was producing high quality work (something more than my HD digital video cameras) and for paying models
   
2. The access to models willing to get it on with a "fluffy guy

Well, I do live in Vegas. Maybe I'll hit it big at the casino one day.